Friends

I'm going through a big life event soon, and due to various circumstances, I'm only inviting blood relatives. A friend of mine for the past seven years had always assumed she would be involved with the event. Now, she's mad at me. It's my fault, I'm too happy, too excited. I want to tell people all about it. I guess saying "guess what, that awesome thing is happening, but you can't come" is bitchy. I have to stop telling people. I have to stop talking about it to people who are close to me but I'm excluding. That's what I'm doing, I'm excluding people who I have confided in for years. I guess this habit of telling myself that I have no friends is really just me pushing my friends away, and an old habit from back in the day when I really did have no friends.